Monday, April 4, 2011

This Twitter Stalker

He texts me "hey writer
I am following you on Twitter"
I call him, but it's a female voice on the receiving end "sorry the mobile subscriber.."
Ha! Like i could even bribe her
He retweets my everything wow
He retweets my December tweets now

He steals tweets too
I don't mulika mwizi though
Only 2 followers - Snaptu and some paediatric Belieber
He follows @Jesus_M_Christ and @JustinBieber
Asks me to follow him, i follow back, he unfollows
Dude says he's drowning his sorrows

I once asked him if he was the same facebook stalker i blocked
He denied and cursed that he only gets cock blocked
Said he was looking at Lupe Fiasco's photo and my name was on the tab
Said twitter suggested he follows me coz i was fab

He tweets #teamfollowback every morning
I ask, is twitter stalking as acceptable as facebook stalking?
Do the creep
He lols and gets cremated in every tweet what a tweep

Never says hi but always ready to Retweet my TYPO
Tweets 24/7 via web, the psycho
Must be having webbed ass from all the debshitting sitting
How many hours does he spend on my feed, no kidding
He calls me the Queen of drama llama
This must be my other madcap ex, oh the karma

No, that one must have skipped twitter fever
Niccar leave me alone, go stalk Bieber
He has three Public lists worth tell
All following @writel
Creepy uncle i can feel my creeper senses tingling
Bet you have multiple accounts? Not winning

It is twitter, we semi-stalk
But not him, is he a 'demigod?'
Changed his twitter handle one time
And tweeted me #heyyoubehindthebushes
I blocked him.